Hard to be upbeat!

I've had a few issues at work lately. Some of you know about it. Well, last night was the Annual Awards Ceremony for us and our team was put in for a Team Award, which I think is a great idea, since everyone has worked so hard at getting our goals met that HQ hands down each year. Of course without our Supervisor John steering things it would not have been a success as a team. So I debated whether to go or not but felt this is a team thing so why not. Support the team. Martha decided she wanted to go along since Grammy was working. Martha met me in town at the train station and we went to dinner. Nice to have a Daddy-Daughter time together. Then we went to the ceremony. Everyone but three of team came. One was off on a vacation with family the other two don't normally do these things. So, the ceremony is about to start and Martha and I sit down with everyone else. I pick up the program and what do I see? I'm getting an "Unsung Hero Award" Are you kidding me? I turn around and said to John "What's this?" He just smiles and shrugs. I don't care for individual awards. Never have, never will! I don't do my work for an award. I do it to care for my family and if anything made me feel good it woulf be the occasional thanks for helping me, kind of thing or when a Stakeholder finally see the purpose of why I'm there and they willingly do what we asked them to do! Really! These awards are so biased and they always leave out someone who works just as hard as me and I feel bad they didn't get something as well. So for me this is was just bad timing. With everything that has been going on at work. Unexpected sure, but not needed.

Then last night I was awakened several times as my heart was doing it's high speed thing again. Not sure how long it lasted but it didn't stop until approx. 0915 this morning. At one point the rate was as high as 167 beats a minute. Mostly around 120 to 145. Grammy thinks I need to go see my doctor again go get my beta blocker dosage upped. Eventually I may have to go see a cardiologist in the future. I've been beat all day. I took a bit of a nap at Heathers house today since I had taken the day off from work.

So hard to be upbeat! But, I know I have many blessings in my life, my sweetie, my kids and grandkids! I have been thinking a lot about retiring lately. But, until Grammy and I get out of debt that won't happen anytime soon!